The Gay Wingman Incident

About a year ago, a friend of mine asked me to go to a party at his college with him because he needed a trustworthy wingman. Naturally, being awesome, I accepted.

We arrived at the party and my friend sees the girl he came to try and hook up with by the bar... sitting next to and talking with her gay best friend. This dude was apparently notorious for cockblocking so my friend asked me to step in. This was not what I signed up for.

Still, I went up to the bar and started talking to the guy. At no point in our conversation did I ever say anything to indicate that I might be gay because, frankly, it seemed wrong to lead the guy on. We just had a friendly conversation. He told me about wanting to dye his hair orange. I told him about how I occasionally sat by myself, shirtless, pretending to be a werewolf because of my rather hairy chest.

After a while, my friend had gone off to make out with the girl somewhere and I decided to take my leave. I told the guy it was nice meeting him and started to walk off. He asked me out.

Now, I appreciate the balls it takes to just ask someone out. I also appreciate the fact that he had actual balls. So I said "sorry, dude, I didn't mean to lead you on, I'm not gay." He walked towards me, leaned in close, and whispered "not yet." He then gave me his number in case I ever changed my mind.

This is now known among my friends as The Gay Wingman Incident.